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for great value kids toys20 Toys We Never Want To See Under The Christmas Tree
The following 20 toys are highly unsuitable gifts for children this Christmas. Some of these toys have actually maimed and even killed children. We really hope that no child receives one of these as a gift this year!
1. Dora Aqua Pet / Dildo
The first thing you will say after looking at Dora Aqua Pet, Is it a toy? Really, it is hard to call it a toy as it is more like a big dick! Even if you think it to be a toy, the colour combination and the whole design is horrendous. What were these guys thinking when producing this awful toy? Do you have an answer?
2. Pole Dancing Doll
Wow, it’s a pole dancing doll! It rotates on a pole and to create an environment there are blinking lights and a disco ball. But, do you think it is the right gift for your girl? I am afraid, not.
3. Superman blow up pillow?
O holy blowhole batman! There is no way on earth I am getting thing pillow. It’s tacky! I really don’t know who allow the person behind this pillow to design it like this. He should be fired for this act, and should be penalized for the tagline, "stuff ““ hug ““ play"!
4. Racist Golliwogs
It was back in February this year when these offensive figurines again caused offence when they first hit some stores in England. This time they were removed from the shelves due to the possibility of strict action taken against them. Still, some English shops sold them successfully as the store manger said that people are interested in these "gollies" for their grandchildren. I would say these dolls are better off left in the past.
5. Harry Potter and the Vibrating Broom
Are you a fan of Harry Potter? Then, this particular broom is actually designed for you.
Mattel has now stopped the production of Nimbus 2000 due to some strange comments. This broom was available with a grooved stick and handle, was battery-operated and it even vibrated. Some of the Amazon comments were very interesting with one 32 year old lady who said she enjoys riding this broom more than their 12yr old and 7 year old. Hmm… what’s so enjoyable about it? I wonder!
6. Spin Master’s Aqua Dots
Spin Master’s Aqua Dots was designed for kids above three years of age. These dots were supposed to unleash the creative skills of kids, but it soon turned out that there was something special in these Aqua dots ““ the date rape drug effect. Yes, this effect was outcome of soaking these dots in water. That’s the big reason why these Dots won’t be around for long; in fact, they are gone already.
7. Snacktime Cabbage Patch Kids
Are you aware of Chucky, a character in a popular movie? Well, if you think these characters are limited to movies, you better think again. And, you should have a look at snacktime Cabbage Patch Kids. Though it is no longer available, we think we should inform you about it. This was the toy with real chewing action, which was meant only for carrots and cabbage. This cabbage patch kid was unable to differentiate between cabbage and a kid’s finger. Thank God this army of cannibals is no longer here otherwise it would become difficult to keep them from striving for human flesh.
8. Lawn Darts
Thank God Lawn Darts would never interfere in our ultra-paranoid, dr. Phil toy culture. They were dangerous! As they carried a lot of weight, there were more than 6,700 injuries and 4 deaths during the 80′s.
Lawn Darts, also known as Jarts, were with a special set of instructions. But, no one ever used them according to these instructions and many skulls were disturbed by these Jarts. In fact, they were banned in 1988 when they caused serious injuries to a 7 year old. Luckily, they are no longer here, but sadly, today’s kids won’t understand the joy and excitement of impaling their close friends with Lawn Darts.
Source oh and you can still buy them here
9. Gilbert U-238 Atomic Energy Lab
It was 1951, A.C, when Gilbert introduced something special with the name U-238 Atomic Energy Lab. Well, it was supposed to be built for the whole math club, to let everyone feel the power and importance of nuclear power. The amazing thing about this lab was that the kit contained three "very low-level" radioactive sources and was priced at $49.50. Basically, there was a Geiger-Mueller radiation counter, a Spinthariscope to view radioactive disintegration, and a Wilson Cloud Chamber to view paths of alpha particles. Plus, as many as 4 samples of Uranium-bearing ores, and an Electroscope was there as well.
Due to all these things, the toy managed to stay on market only for one year. The exposure to U-238 was extremely dangerous and it was associated with the Gulf War syndrome, leukaemia, cancer, and lymphoma. Really, it wasn’t something for kids, or for any average Joe. Fortunately, it’s no longer there otherwise some nerds might still ask Santa for an Atomic Lab.
10. Thingmaker Creepy Crawlers Toy
It is good to give kids a toy to explore their creative sides, but not with something called Thinkmaker Creepy Crawlers toy. This was a toy that was quite popular in 1964. It was basically used to create rubbery insects to throw at others. Created by Mattel, there was a complete set of tubes of plastigoop, molds, and an open-faced frier. This frier has the power to heat up to 310 degrees, which was actually enough for children to set the whole house on fire.
Molds of several multi-coloured critters were used to contain plastigoop over an extremely hot surface. Now, there were two issues with this particular toy. First, the extremely hot surface was enough to remove fingerprints. Secondly, the critters were rather poisonous. Though it was stopped during the 60′s, Mattel started its electric oven, to replace this ‘harmful’ toy.
11. Sky Dancers
The concept was strange. People at Galoob Toys were interested in producing something with the femininity of Barbie and firepower of a bottle rocket. What they produced was their new Sky Dancer. They thought it would do amazingly well for Christmas 1994, but there mixed comments for this particular dancer.
The big concern for people was about the safety of this sky dancer. But, there were many people who thought that the foam wings are soft enough to keep things under control. Due to these proponents of Sky Dancer, this product continued to do well for six years. But, after this time, things started to take a nosedive and the end result was a permanent ban on this product. It was due to so-called soft and cushy wings which were anything thing but soft. It was year 2000 when the CPSC declared that more than 150 children had serious injuries while playing with this Dancer. Erratic flying patterns and sharp blade arms were the reasons behind these injuries. Mild consciousness, temporary blindness, broken ribs, facial lacerations, and scratch corneas were some of the major injuries associated with Sky Dancer. All these issues combined to compel executives to recall more than 9 million Sky Dancers.
12. Mini-Hammocks from EZ Sales
Mini-Hammocks from EZ sales were popular. They were supposed to be harmless; especially, due to no sharp edges, and no lead paint. But, it was during the years 1984 till 1995 when the product started to receive some bad feedback. In fact, it was reported by CPSC in August 1996 that dozens of kids had fatal injuries and near-fatal asphyxiation while playing with these mini-hammocks. Most of these kids were from 5 to 17 years of age. That was the time when more than 3 million hammocks were recalled by the company.
In addition to Mini-Hammocks, Hangouts Baby Hammocks were amongst the banned products. It was made of thin cotton with no spreader bars, so it was difficult to keep it open. Due to this, it was common to see children getting entangles in the net. But come on, did people really think they could get a real hammock for $4?
13. Breast-Feeding Baby
What could be worse than giving your daughter a breast-feeding doll? But, Bebe Gloton, a creation of a Spanish company Berjuan, created this strange dolly. There is a halter-top like bra that is supposed to be removed by girls when nursing with the doll. Another feature worth mentioning is that when the baby latches on to the flowerlike nipples, the doll emits a suckling sound.
Though there are some parents who think it is a good toy for kids to learn the basics about breastfeeding, many are still against it. The opponents of this doll think this is the worst gift for your daughter, as it promotes youth pregnancy. It is due to this reason that Bebe Gloton that sells for $67 is still only available in Spain.
14. Mental Teddy Bears
You can call them a creative toy ““ far more creative than flowers and chocolates. That was the reason why the Vermont Teddy Bear Co.’s Crazy for You bear was a hot gift for Valentine’s Day in 2005. But, it remained in stores for some time when certain organizations started their protest. That was the sad end of these Mental Teddy Bears.
15. Airport Security Play Set
Answer one thing: Do you want your kids to bow down to the man and follow rules? ““ Damn Right you do. Spend $58 on this Playmobil and let your kids get the chance to make airport customers wait in line for hours whilst they force everyone to throw away liquid that is more than 100ml.
16. Pregnant Barbie
Thinking that a pregnant Barbie would raise few eyebrows, Mattel thought of Barbie’s friend, Madge, to test this idea. There were many things to love about this famous blonde, but lack of wedlock made it an inappropriate toy for young girls. The embarrassing thing for most parents is to allow their young daughter play with toy that has a curled up baby in its stomach. No doubt, this is a miracle of nature, but do you really want your daughter to learn all in this tender age? I hope not!
17. Chop Suey Specs
Screams racist…
18. Hitler Doll
In early 2008, there was a story in US and European media about the Ukranian toy manufacturer, who was making and selling an action toy similar to Adolf Hitler ““ Of course, you know him, don’t you? This was called Hitler Doll!
19. McDonald’s Drive-Thru Food Cart
How can you hurt a nation? How about giving all the children a McDonald’s Drive-Thru Food Cart, which will help to promote low self standards, childhood obesity, and of course, child labour. This was a trick played by a fast-food conglomerate to make children know about fast food and the fun associated with the whole thing. Surely, this was not a very good thing to present on Christmas day.
20. Toy Pedo
Strange toy, to say the least! But its the branding approach that was the real concern.
11 Responses to “20 Toys We Never Want To See Under The Christmas Tree”
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hahahaha the last one, Toy pedo, means “i’m drunk” in spanish slang hahahaah
TOYPEDO could be translated as a slang for “I’m drunken” in Spanish
Need to add one to the list “My little mental battery buddy”.
Um i had a Sky Dancer as a kid and there was nothing dangerous about them. The wings were not like “blades” they were too thick to cut anyone and were reasonably too soft to get a that hurt. The worst that could happen is if you put your fingers next to the wings and it takes off but even then you cant get a bruse from it.
of and the broken ribs this if bull to there is just no way that could happen
My sister actually hurt herself with this exact sky dancer. It was mine and I let it off and while chasing it she slammed right into the corner of the room and the hallway. She had to get stiches on her forhead and still has a scar.
that’s hilarious
Unfortunatelly the author does not know what he is talking about, the BEBE GLOTON ( the breastfeeding doll) is adorable and yes your daughter will be very happy to have one and you will love it. Right now is only available on eBay and there are only a few left. It was also on sale on Amazon but the distributor in the USA only started selling on Amazon a couple of months ago and to be able to sell toys on Amazon for the Christmas season you have to have about 25 sales and he only had like 18 , so it is not available there until after Christmas but on ebay it is not problem or you can just email him at garamchai1@aol.com and pay by check, money order or pay pal. If you buy directly from him you can get it for $105 including shipping in the USA
Hey, poor person. Have you ever heard of humor or irony?
Apparently lots of parents are smarter than the author of the article ( which is not hard) and feel the BEBE GLOTON ( breastfeeding doll) is a great teaching tool for their children as the doll is sold out (only a few left on eBay) . The doll is adorable and there is nothing wrong with it. We are a little paranoid in this country.
A lot of these are pretty bad, but some of them are a little blown out of proportion. Yes, we don’t want our kids to get injured, but we don’t want to raise them as over-protected, sheltered morons who cannot use common sense to prevent injury.
For example. Is a five year old child really going to aspire to be Fat Albert after playing with a McDonalds play set? Are we to assume all children are really that stupid? Will the parents be right there encouraging it? I highly doubt it. Sure, it may not be the Organic Vegetable Farm for Vegetarian, Healthy, Tofu-Loving Children play set, but it’s by no means dangerous for your child if they’ve been modeled SOME common sense. I’m surprised to NOT see some of the video games designed for younger children on this list if you’re going to be THAT nit-picky. Would you forbid your children to play Lego Star Wars? Will they automatically assume that if they stab someone, Legos will come pouring out of their gaping wounds instead of blood? You’ll have to, if you use the same logic applied when considering the McDonalds Play Set.
Oh, and can somebody explain the BROKEN RIB injury with the Sky Dancer toy? Were they playing some form of extreme Sky Dancer Frisbee?
Good lord. Some of these listings are great advice if the lot of your children are retarded and incapable of fathoming the basic human need of self-preservation. Instead of teaching them what is right and wrong, you’d rather put them in a plastic bubble. Most people don’t have this problem with their children, mainly because they understand the concept of raising responsible children in a dangerous world.
What you call responsible parenting, I call laziness.
I actually have a scar on my face from a SkyDancer…… the damn thing almost took out my eye.